Dinner guests stream in, demand that food be served early, and then leave before the party is over

Dear Mrs. Manners: A while ago we had a dinner party for about 10 people at our home. One of the couples announced that they had to leave early and that they expected to be served before the other guests.

They have done this a few times, claiming they go to bed early. This couple tends to come to our dinners and rush us. They rarely hang around to socialize. It seems they are interested in the food, but not the company.

I ended up heating up their food early and as good hosts, my husband and I sat with this couple at the table until they finished eating and left. I wanted to tell my husband that he needed to spend time with the other guests while I was busy with this couple, but I didn’t get a moment to tell him that. As a result, we had to leave the other guests alone for about 45 minutes to an hour.

We would like to continue inviting this couple, but we fear it will happen again.

How can we politely explain to this couple that we don’t like being rushed and that it would be very inconvenient and inconsiderate to serve them before the rest?

GENTLE READER: An earlier start time? A revised guest list? Perhaps Miss Manners is missing something, as these solutions seem obvious.

Who are they, that you felt you had to neglect your other guests in order to entertain them? If there is any reason to accept their demands, you could give them a mild reprimand, saying, “We would like to invite you to meet the Pistlethwaits, but last time you left before we could all be seated. What would be a good starting time for you, so that you can be home in time for bed, but we can all dine together?”

And do it 30 minutes earlier, just to be sure.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners on her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or by mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.